I am SorryMerely using the statement as the heading of this section should automatically send a signal of relief through your nerves telling you that for whatever I may have done, I regret or that I should not have allowed the situation get to its current state.
It's that powerful and it is capable of quelling the raging storms of anger in anyone's heart, and I mean ANYONE. But despite its enormous power, for some reasons people don't fully utilize it when it truly matters most.
When Should You Say You Are SorryLiterally, saying that you are sorry means you accept your wrong implying that you actually did something offensive and that you are solely responsible for the problems that arose from it. However, most of the misunderstandings in human relations are seldom due to the contributions of just one of the parties involved. Everyone may have contributed their own share of the wrong in one way or the other.
From the above, it will be just logical to accept that everyone should apologise for the whole dispute. But here comes the problem, who should actually do it or at least who should start it?
You Don't Have to be WrongThe complexity of the human mind has made it in such a way that even the obviously wrong party may not readily admit and say that they are sorry. It is often natural especially when such people have had to go through certain circumstances or if they perceive that the act will portray them as weak.
In situations like this, we should complement the deficiencies bearing in mind that it may just be us the next moment, struggling to admit that we are wrong and taking the bold step to express it to our partner involved.
However, the most beautiful thing is that we don't actually have to be wrong before we say it. Although, it is difficult to have situations when you are totally pure and guiltless if it comes you could still tell the other party that you are sorry. What this does is that it gives them the courage to tell how sorry they are too and it makes them realise how much you value the relationship between you.
When Is It Late to say SorryMany a time, it can look too late to use the magic word. So much may have been lost already or you may have done many crazy things around that makes you feel there is no hope anymore.
One of such scenarios will be exemplified by this little story. It was the evening of a brilliant day. I recalled how I had brutally taken it on a friend of mine. He wasn't totally right anyway. He had previously insulted me verbally and sought to tell everyone how stupid I was. But that's not all. I didn't get a chance to know what exactly my wrong was. I think it would have been fair to let me know, don't you? But then it was my turn, as we saw it. I did even worse things in anger, and I gave the impression that I didn't care what happens between us anymore. I was ready to let go off our union in the cover of 'I Can't Take This Anymore'. But as I laid on my couch that evening, I reasoned everything out and discovered that I may have been wrong all along. Then a flash of thought beamed on my mind What If I Go To Apologize? But I quickly rebuked it by telling myself that he was wrong too. And besides that, I considered that he won't accept anything I say to him not even my apologies. But the word indeed is magical.
Most of the time, the lateness may just be from the fact that you have disobeyed your inner voice telling you to own up and apologize at an earlier time. And now you have incurred so much damage that you would have prevented. Preventable issues are the most felt if they are allowed to manifest.
What to do When It's Too Late to Say ItIndeed, it can often look like it's too late to say you are sorry, either for a wrong you are aware you committed or for something you are totally innocent of. However, this is never real. It may look like so much have been lost already, the deed is done already, or you don't think they will ever forgive. But still, that's the only way forward. By admitting and telling them how sorry you are, the chances of reconciliation are much greater than what you think. It will suffice to add that the sign of genuineness usually involves an additional clause of promise, to be better.
Most times, the lateness may just be the fact that you think that all has already been lost, not because it's really too late
Far from the truth. I agree with you that your first mistake was allowing your mouth withhold from doing some good magic. But now, it is still not too late to say I am sorry. It's never too late. And I am writing this so that you don't make a second mistake that will be worse-rated than the first. That's the mistake of withholding from saying IT.
First, learn to say 'I am sorry' both when you are wrong and when you are not. Next, learn to say sorry even when you missed saying it when it mattered most. Enjoy!
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