Are you experiencing hitches in your relationship with your man? You know he is committed to you but you notice that he is not acting his best around you like your man. Does it seem like his attention is disconnected from you? Or he begins to act bossy or say things that show that he is trying to secure a position of authority in your relationship?
Humans are very complex organisms to understand and it takes a great deal of knowledge to fully understand someone. But trust me, that understanding will make a huge difference.
There are already many ways to get the attention of the man of your dreams, but one simple hack that most ladies have not fully understood is the "hero instinct". The hero instinct is the innate desire of a man to feel like a hero to his woman even without him realizing that he wants it.
The term "hero instincts" was derived from the popular relationship book by James Bauer titled "His Secret Obsession". In his book, Bauer mentioned that the hero instinct is one obsession that men crave even more than love, money, and sex.
The hero instinct boils down to the fact that men need to feel like they are needed especially by women they are attracted to. They need to be seen as heroes and not some undervalued friends.
One of the worst things you can do to a man makes him realize how less manly he is and this you can do in several different ways. However, in this post, you are going to learn about how to trigger the hero instinct in your man and things you should avoid doing or saying in order to make him feel like your hero.
It is important to note that triggering your man's hero instinct goes a long way to make him love and care more for you. There have been testimonies of how unions have been saved because of this understanding. And in the same vein, many relationships and marriages are on the verge of collapsing because someone else, other than the wife/girlfriend knows better how to trigger the hero instinct in the man.
Triggering your man's hero instinct is one powerful way to awaken his most secret and powerful desire to prove his devotion and love to you throughout his lifetime.
When you trigger your man's hero instinct, you see him doing all he can to love you more. The truth is men would naturally gravitate towards someone who makes them feel like a hero than someone who takes them for granted or makes them feel less of themselves.
James Bauer talked about some words that can trigger your man's hero instinct in his book, but in this post you will learn about some actions and words that trigger your man's hero instinct and those that quench with the aim of making your relationship and marriage a better one for both of you.
How To Trigger Your Man's Hero Instincts
- Ask him for help when you are stuck
- Accept gifts from him
- Show appreciation and gratitude to him
- Don't thank him too much
- Listen to him and take his advice
- Give him recognition in front of his peers
- Make him know that he makes you happy
- Encourage him to do what he wants to do and support him in whatever it is
- Apologize when he is offended
- Praise him when he does some great work
- Set or accept challenges with him
Ask Him For Help When You Are StuckYou trigger your man's hero instincts when you ask him to help you do some things, especially tasks that are hard for you. Some ladies would rather tell some outside guy to help them with stuff when they should be directing them to their husband/boyfriend. When a guy loves you, he tries to do all he can to help you and see that you get better by the day.
Accept Gifts From HimHave you ever seen the look on your man's face when you refuse his gifts? Gifts are a sign of love and care and genuine interest in a person. When you refuse gifts from someone, the message that it sends to them is that they are not worthy to give you gifts, or that you do not like the gift they gave to you.
When it comes to gifting, it is important that the giver understands what the person they intend to give the gift wants. That means your man should have already known what you want and what you do not want as a gift. But even if he did not already know that, and he goes on to get something else, it is important not to reject the gift if you want the relationship to continue. You should focus on the intention instead of how undesirable the particular gift item is.
This applies especially to people in a young relationship who are not married yet, or whose commitment to each other still hinges on a lot of things. One easy way to show a man that you are not interested is to refuse his gifts, and you sure don't want to try that with a man you are also interested in. Do you?
Show Appreciation and Gratitude to HimWhen heroes have fought the battle in movies, they are usually given some rewards and your man does not want to be an exception. He wants to be appreciated when he does something really amazing or something just cool. As you grow with him in the relationship, you may have noticed the things he loves being rewarded with and you should be sure to show him some appreciation with those when he does something great.
If his attention on you is beginning to fade, you need to re-ignite his passion for you. But when you do these things to him every time, there are chances that his attention will always stay on you.
Don't Thank Him Too MuchYes, this may go slightly contrary to the two preceding points above but you will soon understand what I mean by this shortly. This applies to anybody who is genuinely interested in you, be it for romantic reasons or not. When someone gifts you genuinely, most of the time he/she just does not need much from you in return. A simple thank you would do but sometimes, people often try to make the thank you to become an alternative way of paying them for what they did.
Over-stressing your thank you can come in various ways as follows;
- When you keep thanking them when they have shown you clearly that they have heard you the first few times.
- When you thank them when he knows that they have not earned it.
Many ladies are very good at turning down the helping hand of their man thinking that they are being considerate without realizing that they are doing more harm than good.
Listen to Him and Follow His AdviceThe truth is not all advice from your man is going to work out just fine. Sometimes, their suggestions will obviously look ridiculous before you but one sure way to get him to know that you believe in him is by following his words of advice and suggestions. You may not have to follow all of them every time. However, you should try not to make him feel ridiculed about them no matter how ridiculous they may seem.
Even if you have a contrary opinion sometimes, deciding to follow his own opinion sometimes would go a long way to further strengthen your relationship with each other and make him to cherish you more. Even when it did not go right in the end, he will still stand by you because he knows you obeyed him irrespective of the outcome you already projected.
This does not mean you cannot put in your own suggestions sometimes, but it is important to keep a balance of which of his opinions you rejected and those you accepted.
Give Him Recognition in Front of His PeersIf you want your man to take you to the top of the world, just make him feel on top of the world. When you give him recognition in front of his peers, that boosts his confidence to serve you more. You should make conscious efforts to speak about him positively in the presence of other people. When people see how much you revere him, they will in turn shower him with the same measure of respect that you have shown him. This boosts his confidence to become more responsible and to love you more.
Some ladies are either too shy or afraid to become vulnerable enough to identify with their man in public. Some men would be able to cope with this and let go, but it is important that you do not leave a loophole in your man's life through which some strange woman will have access to his life and take him from you, especially if you truly love him.
It is also important to say that you should never speak negatively about your partner to other people because when he realizes that you are speaking about his negativity, he will feel betrayed. In times of anger and conflict, try not to say anything about them to a third-party until you have talked it through between both of you. That way you will avoid speaking negatively about your partner.
No matter what reasons you have, never disrespect your man in the public. When you do so, you would have succeeded in stripping him shamelessly naked before everybody, but you know what, he just cannot stand being so humiliated every time. And this will affect how much his attention will be on you.
Make Him Know How Happy He Makes You FeelWhen praises are being sung to the champions in the movies, you can only imagine how the stars fly around their imaginary golden crown. When a man loves you, he wants to make you happy at all times. And even though, some things that may make one or both of you sad or angry could come, he will still try to make you as happy as he could. However, when you whisper to him that he makes you happy, he receives a sense of achievement that he is not doing too bad in his quest to make you feel happy.
When he starts feeling like he is failing in the relationship, his motivation would reduce and if he tries harder and you still do not deliberately attempt to show him that he is succeeding in making you happy, his interests may begin to wane until they totally disappear.
You should show your happiness outwardly in your smiles, your dressings, your speech, and then you should tell him on some occasions that "you are the one that makes me feel happy".
Encourage Him to Do What He Wants to Do And Support Him in Whatever it isMen are very logical. When men are tempted to become unfaithful, they usually think back to some little but mighty things that their woman has done for them. Amongst all other things, men want a woman to be submissive and supportive. That means, she should be willing to support the husband in the vocation he has chosen. There is always room for helpful suggestions in the family or relationship but if the suggestions do not pull through, you must learn to support him as your boyfriend or husband.
Most men actually cheat because they found someone who does it better than their wife or girlfriend, and when I mean better, I'm not referring to sex. But some of those simple things that he craves for.
Apologize When He is OffendedI have recently started announcing the statement that "it takes two to tangle". I don't care to know the origin of that statement or what the original meaning was, but I want to see it as another way of saying that conflicts only arise between two or more people and not less. Conflicts actually arise when both parties stand their grounds never to surrender. But no matter who is at fault, you should always maintain that both of you should not go angry at the same time. Be quick to apologize when he is obviously angry with something even if you may not know what that thing is exactly.
One important cause of concern in this is that you may be thinking that it would overwhelm you when you are the only one apologizing for every conflict but that is the same reason why some of these tips should be applied by both parties.
Set or Accept Challenges With HimMen are naturally very competitive. Normally, you will see him setting targets and challenges by himself and he may want you to play with him. In order to trigger his hero instincts, accept some of these challenges, and work towards certain targets that he fixed by himself.
Why is it important that you accept his challenges? It is important that you challenge him and accept his challenges because that is one great way to push him to be more productive. One major fear you may be having is that you may be thinking that the results of the challenges may upset him and bring up more problems, but inasmuch as men are competitive, he will still see his wife as part of himself. If you win the challenges, he will be happy that you did and if he does, he will be happy with himself and you that he is progressing. And as a super-hero, he would go the extra mile to show you love and care.