Getting out of a toxic relationship, whether with a spouse, a friend, or a family member, is truly one of the most difficult things. However, it is one of the most beneficial things you can do for your emotional and mental health and your overall well-being.
Toxic relationships are more prevalent than you might believe, and devastating consequences can be. Yet, people on the outside typically find these dysfunctional partnerships perplexing.
While each relationship is unique, some steps can help you get out of a toxic relationship with a partner. So, before I get into a step-by-step guide to getting out of a toxic relationship, let’s look at what constitutes a toxic relationship.
What Is A Toxic Relationship?
A toxic relationship constantly leaves you feeling abandoned, misunderstood, and attacked. On a fundamental level, any relationship that makes you feel worse rather than better over time is regarded as a toxic relationship.
Toxic relationships can exist in various settings, including the playground, the boardroom, and the bedroom. You might even have to deal with toxic familial relationships.
In the context of a sexual relationship, a toxic relationship is detrimental. Some indications of a toxic relationship are more visible than others, such as physical abuse, serial adultery, and inappropriate sexual behavior.
Before we get to the steps by step guide to getting out of a toxic relationship, it is important to be aware of the signs that signals that you’re in a toxic relationship.
Signs You Are In A Toxic Relationship
It might be tough to tell if your relationship is toxic because poor behavior is uncommon – but recognizing the indicators can help you determine if something is wrong and whether the problem can be repaired or if you need to get out of the toxic relationship.
Staying for the sake of staying can often lead to further harm, so if any of the indicators below apply to you, it’s time to think about getting out of a toxic relationship.
Here are four signs you may be in a toxic relationship;
You are constantly walking on eggshells
Domineering behaviors from your partner
Feeling of exhaustion after spending time with your partner
You are constantly walking on eggshells
You may be in a toxic relationship if you constantly strive to be on your best behavior whenever you are around your partner. You’re afraid that bringing up difficulties will cause a lot of controversies, so you avoid them and keep your troubles to yourself.
Something is wrong if you can’t be vulnerable in front of your lover! Therefore, you owe yourself to get out of the toxic relationship as quickly as possible.
If you constantly feel sad, angry, anxious, or resigned to the relationship, you’re in a toxic relationship. Likewise, negative shifts in your mental health, personality, or self-esteem can indicate that you are in a toxic relationship. These shifts could range from feeling on edge around your partner to clinically diagnosable conditions such as depression, anxiety, or eating disorders.
If your partner has a habit of constantly disrespecting you, you’re in a toxic relationship. Personal assaults and devaluation of another person’s personality, values, or physical appearance are classic symptoms of a toxic relationship.
Love and mutual respect should be the hallmarks of a healthy relationship. Degradation, condensation, and disrespectfulness are not acceptable.
Your partner constantly exhibits dominating behaviors
Another indication that you’re in a toxic relationship is if your partner has a dominating behavior pattern. For example, does your partner constantly inquiring about your whereabouts? When you don’t respond to messages right away, do they grow annoyed or irritated, and they may text you repeatedly until you do.
These actions could result from jealousy or a lack of trust, but they could also indicate a craving for control, leading to relationship toxicity. In addition, these attempts at control may indicate abuse in some circumstances.
Spending time with your partner leaves you exhausted
Spending time with someone who is intended to be special in your life should energize you rather than empty you. When you spend time with a toxic person, you may feel emotionally exhausted because you feel like you’re the one who is always giving and putting up effort without receiving anything in return.
If your partner doesn’t also respect boundaries, you’re in a toxic relationship. Toxic personalities are known for constantly pushing and overstepping boundaries, leaving you feeling overwhelmed with self-doubt and frustration.
7 Steps To Get Out Of A Toxic Relationship
Here are 7 steps to get out of a toxic relationship to avoid problems.
1. Recognize that there is a problem
The first step to getting out of a toxic relationship is to admit that there is a problem. The problem is that you are in a toxic relationship.
What are some of the telltale indications of a toxic relationship you’ve noticed? For example, have you been subjected to emotional or physical blackmail by your partner? Has there been a lot of lying? Has your partner been harsh in their communication style? These and the other signals I listed above in this article are indicators that you are in a toxic relationship.
2. Recognize that it’s fine to go your separate ways
The second step to getting out of a toxic relationship is realizing firmly that it is okay to leave a relationship. Some people aren’t meant to be in your life in the first place. They’re supposed to come in, teach you a lesson, and then leave.
Aside from love, both parties must regularly invest and work on their relationship to make it work. It’s fine to go your separate ways if the other side loves you with words but not acts.
3. Make a detailed plan
The third step to getting out of a toxic relationship is to map out a clear plan for what comes next after you have left the toxic relationship. Once you’ve decided to get out of a toxic relationship, you have to plan how you will deal with the transition.
Financial independence is crucial to your freedom. If you were dependent on your toxic partner, you might need to strategize how to survive financially when you get out of the toxic relationship. For example, if you don’t currently have a career, you might consider going to school, getting new training, or beginning a job.
4. Express your feelings
When you’ve decided to get out of a toxic relationship, it’s critical to communicate your sentiments to your partner. An in-person chat is okay if your partner is emotionally mature, but writing out your feelings may be the best option if they are short-tempered or emotional.
It’s essential to convey how your relationship makes you feel without pointing fingers. Instead of stating something like, “You make me feel…”, say something like, “I feel sad or furious when I hear you say…” You have no control over how the other person reacts, but you have power over how you communicate your emotions (in a neutral way).
Regardless of how they respond, sharing your feelings is necessary for getting out of a toxic relationship.
5. Remain firm in your decision to leave a toxic relationship
The next step to getting out of a toxic relationship is to remain firm in your decision to leave. If you’re considering getting out of a toxic relationship, you’ve probably tried unsuccessfully to persuade your partner to change their behaviors.
If this is the case, you’ll need to remind yourself that it’s not your fault regularly. Even if a toxic partner decides to change their ways, it is most likely due to you getting out of the relationship. If you get back together, there’s a good possibility the relationship will stay toxic.
So do not backtrack on your decision to get out of a toxic relationship. Instead, stay firm with that decision and seek healing.
6. Cut off contact
Once you have gotten out of a toxic relationship, it is important to cut off any communication with the person. However, keeping in touch with your ex opens the possibility of reconciliation.
You must understand that toxic people can be manipulative, and they may try to entice you back into the toxic relationship by using emotional blackmail. If you’ve decided to leave your toxic partner, don’t communicate with them unless you have children and need to co-parent.
Furthermore, seeing your ex on social media will rekindle memories of the toxic relationship, so block them on your phone and find ways to avoid running into them in person. These activities will establish a clear line between what is acceptable and what is not acceptable.
7. Seek the assistance of a therapist
Lastly, getting out of a toxic relationship may necessitate assistance in developing a game plan, depending on the situation’s intensity. You can find a therapist to talk to, or confiding in friends and family can also be beneficial.
A qualified therapist can assist you in coping with the trauma of the toxic relationship or help you get over it. They could also be beneficial in rebuilding your self-worth and addressing any safety concerns that you may face.
Just because you’ve had a bad relationship doesn’t rule out the possibility of finding your perfect partner; you should not concentrate on your previous mistakes; instead, resolve to move on and start a new life!
A single blunder or miscalculation cannot define the rest of your life. There are a billion choices available. Moving on from a toxic relationship is difficult, but it is the best option.
I am Kehinde Akinnibosun, a content writer with over 3 years of experience. I am passionate about creating and developing strategic content to meet different needs in areas relating to the following niches – lifestyle, sports, technology, health, and entertainment. When I am not punching my keyboard or looking up an article, I am watching football or having a light banter on Twitter.