I was lying on my bed, feeling hopeless. I had just failed another exam, after going through a series of failures. I had sought ways to excel, tried many new study methods, adopted new interventions, and took to the advice of people on how to do better at my studies. There is nothing I have not tried out. These thoughts drenched me on my lonely bed.
I felt discouraged and never wanted to continue or even try again another time. I didn’t want anyone to help me out of this sorrow. I loved to feel it because it looked to me like that would be the last things I’d enjoy before I give on trying any further, I mean giving up is still a possibility, right?
Many a time, we experience feelings of depression after we have put all our efforts into something to no avail. It is a perfectly natural feeling that almost every adult in the world can relate to. It is normal to feel like giving up after you may have tried many times. It is normal to feel depressed and discouraged at such times that it becomes very difficult to feel encouraged yet again.
If the feeling of giving up is so normal and even common, how then do people overcome this feeling? I am aware there are people who wouldn’t need to worry about their grades in school because they are consistently doing well. There are people who appear not to have experienced any challenges in their business at all. What about those who were born with a silver spoon and never have to worry about what to eat, what to wear or about getting money to do all kinds of shopping they desire?
It may be so easy to imagine that such people who have no problems exist. Quite easy because there are one or two people around you that seem to fulfil the criteria of a “challenge-free” life, but is that really the case?
At some point, everyone on the globe would experience some frustrating events, that would cause them so much discouragement, grief, and depression, but should you give up on those?
Why Giving Up Is Not An Option Really
Motivational speakers give you some strange and unthinkable speeches that would not only blow your mind but also open you up to try some of your most feared activities, either for productivity, business, personal development, or excelling at just anything you are especially interested in.
What can be more encouraging than hearing a motivational speaker say “Giving up is not an option”? That could spur you to rise up from your depression and discouragement within the brink of the eyeblink. However, beyond what is being said by motivational speakers, giving up is not really one of the options.
Every successful story you may have heard today had some failures along the way. The resultant success is a product of someone who was determined never to give up. But how did they do it? That must be the most difficult thing to do – rising from the shambles of discouragement.
The levels of endurance and perseverance vary for different people. When these thresholds have been exceeded, it gives rise to a feeling of hopelessness and saturation. It feels like you cannot take any more troubles, pushing you into a violent explosion at one extreme and a depressing outlook on the other.
How much you can take varies from what I can and vice-versa. In any case, it is important to do all it takes to stay encouraged and to rise out of discouragement if you eventually overwhelm your endurance limits.
If you want to be successful at anything you do, you must accept the obligation to stay motivated and encouraged at all times and to rise out of the ashes of discouragement when it eventually sets in. Depression saps your energy to succeed away. It takes away your drive, renders you hopeless and gives you a feeling of worthlessness. It becomes very important to stay encouraged at all times and to learn to rise out of discouragement as fast as naturally possible.
How To Encourage Yourself When You Feel Like Giving Up
How can you get encouragement again when you feel low? I can’t say that it’s going to be easy to encourage yourself. The ideal thing is that those around you should be able to sense your mood changes and respond to them accordingly, and you should be able to do this for them too but the world has evolved into a place where nobody cares for their neighbour anymore. So, how do you encourage yourself when nobody cares to help you through?
1. First, avoid being seriously discouraged
Discouragement comes at different points in our lives. Certain conditions like stress, hunger and fatigue can predispose us to discouragement and we may lapse into the inevitable state of depression, and hopelessness. But what if I tell you that it is possible to avoid being seriously discouraged in the first place?
They say “Happiness is a choice and it’s free”. That means you can choose to be happy at no extra cost, or you can choose to remain despondent, totally your choice. To avoid being seriously discouraged, you must learn to keep your happiness at all times no matter how much circumstances and people try to steal it away.
Another way you can avoid being seriously discouraged is by learning to recognize toxic people and events and staying away from them. You should also learn to take some break from activities when you notice that you are getting overtly stressed up because there is a strong link between stress, explosive anger and a feeling of giving up.
2. Get some distance from triggers
Getting distance means you need to stay away from people, things and events that remind you that you will never make it. You can achieve anything you put your mind to do if you stay determined but sometimes, we get overwhelmed by a lack of success or many near-success experiences.
The reason why you should maintain some distance from your most difficult tasks is that you want to be able to heal from the trauma of repeatedly failing at them so that you can have enough energy to face them again. Also, you can use your time away to think about your actions and their outcomes so you can learn your lessons for your future attempts.
One great way you can maintain a distance from your most difficult without wasting precious time of productivity is by doing something else you like and is also productive. For example, if you have experienced countless failures while learning to code (computer programming), you could take a break after a while and go into graphic design or other skills you also enjoy.
3. Go have some fun
Getting some distance also involves staying away from work entirely. It may not be the most logical thing to do at the time, as in, how do you expect someone who just failed a test to go out to have fun? Can they ever be comfortable doing that?
It is important to sometimes, you might have to distract yourself a little so that you can build up your motivation reserve, otherwise, you may lapse into a state of severe discouragement at which point it becomes more difficult to encourage yourself.
4. Keep looking forward
Think about the great stories of success you have heard before. Were those people who achieved such great success immune to the feeling of giving up? No, there were just like you are. They felt everything you feel but they were determined to succeed in the midst of everything that weighed them down. Looking forward, your own story can be next.
5. Recognise that every challenge is a stepping stone
Albert Einstein was said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result”. This singular statement looks very simple and unrelated but it holds the key to your evolution to the next level of development.
Challenges may seem very insurmountable and can create a cycle of failure, doing the same thing over and over again without any success. If you allow yourself to stay in that cycle for too long, you may end up fatigued and discouraged but here is how you can break free from this cycle.
First, recognise that every challenge is a stepping stone for development. Secondly, realise that you cannot overcome the challenge by doing the same things you have been doing. Instead of getting disocuraged by the supposed failures, think about what you can do differently and keep moving on.
Encouraging yourself by yourself is something you are going to get used to because you might not get enough encouragement from other people most of the time. The above five tips will help you avoid getting seriously discouraged, or help you find your way back to your motivation and enthusiasm. Remember, no one is going to motivate you more than yourself. Have a good day.
I am a seasoned writer, not because I am some genius but thanks to many years of trials, failure, and near successes. I curate the most content on this website; all geared towards making you a better and happier audience.