Do you hate the way you look? Finding people who hate how they look is not something very rare anymore. A recent study[1]Body Image Survey Results – Women and Equalities – House of Commons UK done in the UK showed that a majority (61% of adults and 66% of children) feel negative or very negative about their body image most of the time.
A majority (71%) of respondents with a disability reported feeling ‘negative’ or ‘very negative’ most of the time about their body image compared with 60% of respondents without disabilities.
13% of Cisgender respondents reported feeling ‘very negative’ about their body image most of the time compared with 23% of Transgender respondents. Not a single Transgender respondent felt ‘very positive’ about their body image and only 1% of Cisgender responders did. 62% of women feel negative about their body image compared to 53% of men.
Irrespective of gender, race, or disability, many people would say they hate how a part or whole of the body looks. You ought not to hate the way you look because you look wonderful. You are just not looking at yourself the way you should.
In this article, you will learn all you need to know to bring out your true beauty and begin your journey to love yourself or your looks, instead of feeling ashamed of your own looks.
Why You Often Find Something ‘Imperfect’ About Your Body
There is always something in our body that feels off, something that looks imperfect. For me, it’s my slight knock knees. Yeah, it appears as if my legs are not straight enough, but fortunately, I don’t give a damn how it looks. I walk confidently without worrying about what anyone else thinks, and thankfully, no one seems to worry about it as well.
Almost everyone, if not everyone in the world can acknowledge one or more parts of their body that ‘seem’ flawed. I don’t know the rationale behind why that happens, but I guess it’s just nature’s way of keeping our beauty pride in check. When you think you are the most beautiful creature on the planet, you quickly remember what you personally consider a flaw in your body.
Remember, your perceived flaws and imperfections may not be obvious to other people. And if you are overtly worried and disappointed about your looks, you might be overdoing it. You should not absolutely hate the way you look, rather you should acknowledge that you are beautiful, and then work out ways to enhance your beauty.
In this post, you will learn everything about appreciating your own looks, and ways you can enhance your beauty.
Reasons You Hate How You Look
You probably have knock knees as I do, or you have thick eyebrows. You may be unsatisfied with your body weight, stature, complexion, or height. This is a common experience. But again, you are looking at it the wrong way.
Many people feel bad about how they look because they compare themselves with other people. They allow other people’s standards to be their own personal definition of what is beautiful and what is imperfect, but this ought not to be so. You need to decide to love yourself the way you are, irrespective of what other people think about you.
You see Instagram pictures and they remind you of how ugly your body or a part of it looks, but you forget that no one puts their ugly pictures out there no matter what. With lots of filters on Instagram, people can transform everything they would consider imperfect to become the most beautiful sight to behold. People even go the extra mile to manipulate the images using advanced programs like Photoshop just to look perfect. And here, you are comparing your natural self to that.
Comparing yourself with other people is the most important reason why you feel like you are ugly even when you are not. You are beautiful; people are admiring you. The only person who is yet to do so is yourself.
You Can Change Your Looks to Look Better
It’s not every time you dismiss how you hate the way you look. For example, when your hair is unkempt and your beard looks unshaven, there is something you can do about it. You can have a shave. If you hate how fat you are, you could sign up for workout sessions to burn off some fat.
However, you need to understand that it’s not everything you can or should change because the goal is not to achieve a perfect body. The goal is to accept that you are perfect, irrespective of how you look.
Many people who are discontented with their looks engage in invasive or semi-invasive surgical or medical procedures to enhance their beauty. These procedures include beauty surgeries, hips and breast enlargement surgeries, and others. This makes such people look better in their own eyes, as they feel like they have one less imperfection to attend to, but such procedures are not without health consequences. Besides, you can’t fill the void it would create as you will constantly need to do more and more.
It is cheaper, safer, and more satisfying to accept how you look and feel proud of yourself, or only minimally and naturally enhance your look.
You Don’t Like How I Look on Camera?
Photogenic is the word for someone who looks very great in photographs or films. Just a small striking pose and you are looking all so beautiful or handsome. Not everyone looks great in pictures, even when they look super good off-camera. This is because of a number of reasons:
- You don’t know how to strike a good pose.
- You don’t smile the right way.
- The direction of the light and picture quality of the camera.
- The person taking the photo.
- You are not looking in the right direction.
People that don’t like the way they look on camera often shy away from taking pictures or featuring in video recordings. They hate how they would eventually look, and I can totally understand. However, for sake of the future (you may need to be on live TV or others), you need to embrace how you look both in real life and on camera while working on ways to naturally work on your appearance. For example, learning to position yourself for the camera.
Stop Being Hard on Yourself
For a majority of people, no one has ever complained about their looks before. They are the only ones who seem to take note of the flaws, and this is often because they compare themselves to other people. Those people you compare yourself with may secretly envy your look, but you wouldn’t know that. So, instead of being so hard on yourself to look like other people, be happy with how you are. That will give you the motivation to look better without trying to look like someone else.
You need to stop comparing yourself to other people. You are amazing just the way you are. People will never show you their ‘imperfect’ pictures on social media. With a lot of filters on Instagram, you can be sure to have near-flawless pictures of people you admire. So, why should you compare yourself to made-up effects?
Here is a video of a woman who has overcome the feeling of hatred for how she looks. This video is for those who hate the way they look, who feel ugly, or who are tempted to always compare themselves to other people.
Important Things to Note About Your Looks
Looks give a great first impression about anyone, and it is important you learn to optimize how you look as much as possible. But as you should have already seen in this article, you can’t change everything. And even if it were possible, it is not necessary. Instead, you should learn to love yourself and not judge yourself like others would.
Here are some important things you need to know as far as your looks are concerned.
- People might hate you, shame you, or bully you because of your looks, but you are perfect just as you are. Let that be the only thing you believe.
- Don’t place your self-worth on your looks alone. Even if acne floods your face, your confidence should not be tied to just your facial looks.
- Don’t let people judge you into believing you are ugly. Even the most beautiful or handsome person can be made to think otherwise if care is not taken.
- Don’t let anyone use your looks against you and don’t use condemn your look by yourself either. Love your looks, and even if there are any ‘imperfections’ you may notice, remember that none of those define how beautiful you truly are.
Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder
You may be born with a congenital malformation that significantly alters your looks. It may just be how your parents look. In many cases, you are made to believe, by society’s standards of beauty, that you are ugly. You begin to hate how you look because you obviously don’t look as beautiful as the other person.
One important thing you need to know about your beauty is that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. When you think you are ugly, just pray to find that one person who would consider you the greatest sight they ever behold.
What Happens When You Hate How You Look?
The outcome of hating how you look is often not a very great one. When you hate the way you look, it can affect your psyche, your energy, and your motivation in life. The following list shows some negative effects that hating yourself might bring you.
- Lack of confidence
- Low self-esteem
- Depression and anxiety
- Relationship problems
- Insecurity, etc
Body Dysmorphic Disorder
Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD), also known as body dysmorphia, or ‘dysmorphophobia’, is a psychiatric condition characterized by one’s hatred for one’s looks. People with BDD spend a lot of time worrying about flaws in their bodies. These flaws are often unnoticeable by others, and the worry can become very distressing to the patient.[2]Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) – NHS (www.nhs.uk)
BDD occurs throughout the world and affects both genders, but it is hard to tell whether it is more common among women than in men. People with BDD obsess that there is something wrong with how they look, even though the perceived appearance flaw is minimal or even non-existent. As a result, they perform repetitive, compulsive behaviors aimed at examining, improving, or hiding the supposed defect.[3]Body dysmorphic disorder: recognizing and treating imagined ugliness – PMC
BDD patients may describe themselves as looking deformed and unattractive. They majorly focus on minor changes on their face or head (like acne, skin color, balding, or head size) but can include other areas of the body. The preoccupation to adjust their looks can be difficult to resist or control, and this can consume an average of 3 to 8 hours a day.
BDD is associated with fears of rejection and a feeling of low self-esteem, shame, embarrassment, or unworthiness. While others may see it as irrational, people with BDD lack insight. They are delusional and would believe against sound evidence that they indeed look abnormal.
Final words
If you hate the way you look, there are many possibilities as to why you do. Here, we have examined why you might hate your own looks, with the aim of reorienting you to accept that you are beautiful and perfect in your own right. Comparing yourself with other people and social media is one topmost reasons why people hate how they look, and we have seen that it is unnecessary to do so.
Lastly, we looked at body dysmorphic disorder as a reason why certain people would hate how they look. BDD is a psychiatric condition, thus, it might require the services of a professional (a psychiatrist) for diagnosis and treatment.
On a final note, there is no reason to hate the way you look, no matter what. You are beautiful, you are amazing just the way you are. Embrace it, stand tall, and tell yourself that you are the best ‘you’ that can ever exist.
