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Home Relationships

There Is No Love At First Sight, Here Is Why

by Prosper Yole
February 8, 2020
Reading Time: 4 mins read
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Love at first sight; source: Shutterstock

One of the most romantic parts of Hollywood love movies is the part where the boy meets the girl by the walkway and helps her pick up the books he mistakenly pushed off her hands. Their eyes then lock together and it is sustained for a few minutes. Then the young man stutters as he asks to see her at other times and the beautiful young woman smiles consentingly.

What Is Love At First Sight?

But when you consider love, is it so simple and uncomplicated? What was demonstrated is what we call love at first sight. Falling in love with someone the first time you meet. But truth be told, those everyday attractions are normal in the life of everyone with emotions. But the big question is, does that constitute love?

When love is discussed, the topic is usually too large to decipher in a jiffy and I am not about to make an attempt to discuss love now. But one thing we all must have known is that those attractions are elements that love can utilize in one way or the other. But true love is not based wholly on them. We are often unsure at what point love can be affirmed but let’s explore the question together, Is there love at first sight?

Is There Love At First Sight?

Countless times, what was originally thought to be love end up failing woefully. And at other times, it makes it to the leaderboard. But what we quickly call love at first sight, is actually a mere feeling of attraction to someone that needs to be validated with time.
We get attracted to different people for different reasons. That is to prove that we as humans were made to be social and interact with ourselves. However, not all unions are meant to last forever. There are some that come and go, while others pass the test of time.
There is a likelihood that the stroke of attraction that you had for each other at first sight, should just remain less emotional at the moment. But it becomes a wrong assumption to claim that you have met your life partner so quickly.

Why There Is No Love At First Sight

There may be some attraction at first sight, but there is no love at first sight. I may have already talked about some reasons in the paragraph above but let us reason further together. Have you ever imagined the number of people you get attracted to on a daily basis? Will you now claim to love them all?

Loving people around you on a neutral non-erotic level is important for community growth and peaceful living. And according to a previous post here, self-love forms a great part of how we love others around us.

But instead of using “love”(erotic, in this sense), we can alternatively use “attraction” at first sight.

Commitment Remains The Foundation Of Love

If we were to define love, it would be the commitment to be with someone irrespective of some prevailing situations. Love has to be mutual for a true relationship to be established. Hence, the commitment should be from both sides on how to make their union work.
Occasionally, one party can sacrifice to save both of their faces, at which point it seems as if there is no mutuality at the moment. In this case, commitment is measured by how well the other non-mutual partner is willing to repent and bring back the love.
Love should, therefore, be measured from the standpoint of commitment and not from some arbitrary beliefs in “love at first sight”.

Love Is Capable Of Growth

Growth is a characteristic of all living things and it is also a character of love too. Does it mean love is also a living thing? You may choose to see it that way.
But, love is capable of growing in the heart of someone who seems not to have it before. And by this love, I refer to those first sight feelings.
In other words, the feelings of attraction that may be seen at first sight can be triggered and nurtured so far as there is the required physical contact. Over time, people who are seen as just friends with no feelings attached begin to have feelings for each other as they move on together.

But in all, love at first sight is only as fleeting as the one that comes at any other times. What makes the difference is the commitment to stay put, and truly love till the end.
Another thing that is worth considering is the desire to be committed may not be mutual for both parties. But attraction forms a basic element for commitment. That is to say, there will most likely be the desire to be committed to each other when both individuals are attracted to each other.
But suffice to say that if the initial attraction phase is bypassed, there can still be some affection in a later time so long as the individuals maintain only some physical intimacy/contact.

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Prosper Yole

Prosper Yole

I am a seasoned writer, not because I am some genius but thanks to many years of trials, failure, and near successes. I curate the most content on this website; all geared towards making you a better and happier audience.

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