To think that old people don’t have anything to offer you as a young person is, in fact, one of the most erroneous assumptions. Having lived in the world for so long, you can be sure they have some powerful life lessons to teach younger people. While these life lessons may be invaluable to the success of younger people, old people don’t readily share these life lessons with everyone. There are some things you need to do to earn it.
Being close to old people can sometimes be a major hassle considering that they might have an entirely different view about lifestyles. Many things have changed over the years, cultures and ways of life are no more the way they used to be. But while these things have changed, their wisdom principles do not change. Life’s lessons from old people will remain useful in this life and the next.
Coupled with their problems of ageing, being close to old people can be distressing no doubt but if you know what you stand to gain from being around them, you will treasure every second you spend with them. On this note, I will show you some powerful life lessons you can learn from old people and six ways you can do that.
10 Powerful Life Lessons from Old People
In my interactions and relationship with old people, here are some important life lessons I have learned from them. I have learnt a lot of lessons interacting with senior citizens but these ten will likely be among the topmost lessons I’d like to share with you.
1. Life is short; value it
Each time I am with senior citizens, there is a constant expression I get from them. They make you understand the entire past was like yesterday. Everything feels fresh and recent. The only thing that is different is that they don’t have as much strength as they once had. Some of the things they enjoyed are no longer interesting to them.
Life is short, time flies, years go by in a second and you wonder how you got here. Being close to old people reminds you of the importance of salvaging your youthful energy to do the most important things in your life.
2. Don’t waste your youthfulness
Many senior citizens I have interacted with often wish to claim youthfulness because they don’t seem to be able to understand how the changes occurred too quickly. A few of them get angry when you refer to them as old; they don’t want to be addressed as that. But if you ever give them a chance to educate you, this is one of the lessons they would teach you: youthfulness is a gift, don’t waste it.
Young people often think youthfulness is a time to engage in all sorts of dangerous activities that your energy can permit, but that is oftentimes not very correct. Youthfulness is the time to use your strongest mental and physical energy to plan for your old age. That’s the simple description.
3. Life does not give an excuse to do regrettable things when you can
Have you ever heard of the phrase, “Enjoy yourself when you are young”? This is a common statement in many parts of the world. Young people think that youthfulness is the time to be careless and nonchalant but old people agree less with this.
The fact that you can afford to does not mean you should do things you will regret later in your life. These include things that will harm your health, your mind, and your finances. You must be deliberate in put your future into consideration. The few who got these things right are living their old age happily but the others who made these mistakes will always forewarn you to desist from any act that may affect you negatively in the future.
4. All is vanity – food, money, etc
Have you ever asked an old person what their favourite food is? It’s literarily hard to know if they ever have favourites anymore. Everything seems bland and vain, and you can feel it from their face that while food and money are important, they are not the most important things about life.
Sometimes, they would sit quietly on their own thinking about the past. Sometimes, some of those thoughts are about what they think they could have done differently. They would open up to you if you know how to make them teach you. I will show you this shortly.
5. Everyone is important
No matter how big you become, old people teach you that everyone is important. You might become arrogant when you accumulate wealth, fame, or influence but interactions with old people make you realize that no matter who you are, everyone matters.
What have they not seen? They have seen the ups and downs of life. Some old people have seen what it feels like to be wealthy and poor. Everything just seems transient to them and they will readily communicate this with you if you are receptive.
One of the greatest gifts you’d ever get in this life is the gift of people. Things come and go, but humans are the only objects that can feel what you feel and can relate to your everyday experiences. When everything else fails, the people you impacted are the ones that will stand by you. And if there is one thing I have observed about old people, it is how they cherish everyone, great or small.
6. Being kind to people is a duty
Old people have the softest hearts ever; maybe after children. In a world where there doesn’t seem to be any reward for kindness, old people come to reignite the flames of kindness in our hearts.
People would make you lose your love and kindness, they would make you happily wicked, old people can also attest to this. But one important thing you can learn from old people is that beyond the rewards, kindness is a duty, and it is rewarding to have a clear and kind conscience.
7. Not everything can be physically explained
While most young people want answers to everything, old people have come to the conclusion that not everything can be logically explained. There is a lot to learn about the world, and a few years, say 100, might not be enough to learn everything.
Having spent many decades on the surface of the planet and they clearly understand that they still don’t understand everything is enough for old people to conclude that not everything can be understood from the realm of science, logic, and intelligence.
8. The little things of life matter – family, love
Many people erroneously ignore the most important things in life and pursue the irrelevant ones. Some of life’s greatest gifts are free, and these include love and family. Old people would teach you that those little things matter a lot. Don’t turn your back on them, especially in search of other things you might consider very important as well. Maybe, create a balance.
9. Humility is a virtue
Sometimes, it could baffle you how humble some senior people are. They don’t feel so big and make you feel so small. They try to make you feel welcome around them.
That is not also to say that there are not some old people who might be malignant towards young people. Some old people can even make life extremely difficult merely by being around them. This is worse amongst those who are struggling with some medical or psychiatric conditions.
10. Face your fears
Life’s biggest regret is looking back and remembering the things you didn’t do because you were too afraid to do. What’s the worst thing that can happen when you take on something extraordinary? You’d fail and try again. When you fail, you learn more ways to succeed.
When you allow your fear to dominate you, the regret can consume you so much that you can’t hide it anymore. Many old people have been caught in this net of regrets, and they would talk about it if you care to know. Reduce your regrets during old age by facing your fears now.
Other things you learn from being close to old people include;
- They may teach you to understand life better.
- They may forewarn you about some of life’s most committed mistakes.
- Teaches you the importance of building relationships in one’s journey in life.
- Teaches you about what to expect from life and how to prepare to handle them.
Common Problems with Old People
Old people or senior citizens, as they are more nicely referred, have important life lessons to teach the younger generation. They have wisdom tips that can change your life for the better. But there are some challenges that may be associated with old people, in trying to learn life lessons from them.
1. They can sometimes be too desirous of respect
Old people deserve to be respected by everyone, especially those younger than them. This is a commonsense thing for everyone to do. For someone who has lived several decades on the earth before you, it might feel normal for them to demand some more respect, but some old people might have the subconscious habit of demanding too much respect.
One of the reasons why some of them act this way is probably because of how younger people, including their children, gradually begin to see them as less than how they were previously seen. They are used to being seen as the big figure the kids looked up to. Life changed, and even parents in their old age begin to act like babies. In realization of this change in authority, old people might want to re-assert their position by rubbing it in your face every time, that they are older and deserve more respect.
2. Some old persons may offer negative advice
Depending on the particular old person’s view about life, they may offer you counterproductive advice. There are basically two types of people in the world; those who learn from their mistakes, and those who stick with their mistakes. Some old people who once enjoyed life in a rather unproductive way tell you to live your own life as well, instead of forewarning you about the lessons they might have learnt from their past actions.
Common youthful activities that most old people regret in their old age include those related to alcohol, sex, women, and the money mindset.
3. Health issues may alter their behaviours
Aged people often have health challenges associated with their age. The body’s systems no longer function as well as before, and it can stand to reason. Some illnesses associated with agedness can be very burdensome and distressing to other people, including caregivers.
For example, some old people can have urinary incontinence which can affect how well they are able to control their urination. They end up urinating everywhere and anywhere around the home. Other health problems include dementia (known as senile dementia) where they forget things, events, places, people; and others.
The consequences of these health problems can affect how they relate with other people around them and the amount of burden they give to caregivers.
- Early exposure to wrong influences and habits like drugs, alcohol and women. Not common with aged people (>60-65years), however.
- Negative ideologies about life
- Lack of faith that anyone can make it
- Lack of faith in hard work particularly in those who worked so hard without lasting results
6 Ways to Learn Powerful Life Lessons from Aged People
Learning life lessons from older people requires you to behave in a certain way. While having a conversation with them, they would take every opportunity to spew out life lessons, but only to a prepared and deserving ear. The following will make you deserving of receiving life lessons from old people?
1. Give them respect
Respect is the number one rule you must observe when dealing with older people. They deserve to be respected by virtue of their age, and some of them would clearly express it when you don’t respect them enough.
There is an African proverb that says, “Only a child that washes his hands well, has the chance to dine with the elders”. Older people belong to an elite group; the only way to gain access to them is if you do what they would not condemn. One of the best ways to win over their respect is by giving them the respect that they are due.
2. Know your place
Breaking into the caucus of older people, and making them approve of you as worthy is the easy part. Sustaining that access is even more challenging. After they might have allowed you into their inner circle, know your place and continue to respect them as being older than you.
Sometimes, an old person might be fully dependent on your care. It is still very important to stay respectful even after earning their trust and respect. Once they perceive that you recognise your place, they would be motivated to teach you some of life’s greatest lessons.
3. Listen more than you speak
Listening is an active process of yielding your attention to someone while they speak. To the elderly, active listening is a sign of respect. It shows that you are willing and humble enough to learn from them.
Active listening means you are actively trying to understand what the person is saying, and not merely waiting silently for them to finish their jargon. If you are a great listener, you’d be friends with many aged people by default, and they will not hesitate to teach you some of their own honest life lessons.
If you do not show signs that you are a good listener, be rest assured that old people would never listen to you as well. Naturally, aged people are also great listeners but they always first try to ascertain if you are deserving of it or not.
4. Be physically and mentally present for their needs
Many old people have issues like faecal and urinary incontinence, amnesia, heart disease, endocrine diseases, etc. These can make it more difficult to care for them. They often feel how difficult it is for you to care for them, and they would have a sense of indebtedness if you are doing it cheerfully still.
Actively look out for their needs. Be physically and mentally present. This does not mean that you would not have times when you would be tired. But if you put your heart into caring for their needs, they would start thinking of how they can reciprocate your genuine deeds. They might not have money or assets they can will down to you but they would give you some of the best life secrets that would help you throughout life and endeavours.
5. Make them feel how they want
Old people like to feel young. They don’t want to be seen or addressed as old and outdated. Several generations and cultural changes have occurred but they want to feel current. This stands to reason because everyone gets to see life as a fleeting experience; childhood would soon appear as if it happened yesterday.
Some old people like to feel old and respected as such. They acknowledge that times have passed between their life, and they expect you to know that they have experienced a lot more than you have.
Therefore, to gain acceptance before any old person and to get great life lessons from them, you need to first understand how the aged individual wants to be seen and addressed.
6. Be submissive when they are angry
Older people can get angry for no given reason. Sometimes they might feel you do not understand them enough. Sometimes they are stereotyped in the way things should be done and would feel disappointed if you do them differently.
Whether they are angry for irrational reasons or not, it is your duty to be the one to bow in submission. Keep mute when you need to, especially when they are sounding annoyed. Avoid laughing necessarily when they are being serious.
Whenever an older person is angry, that is not the time to shout back or query their actions. It is the time to stay calm, listen to what they have to say, and let the express their rage. You will later find that by doing so, they come to love you even more and become more willing to teach you their more powerful life lessons based on their life experiences.
You learn so much when you ask them specific questions
There is an African proverb that says, “What an elderly man sees while sitting down, a young person cannot see while standing up”. One of the best ways to tap from their wealth of wisdom is by asking them for advice in specific areas of your life, maybe business, relationship and marriage, etc.
There is a lot they would like to tell you, and when you ask them questions, you gradually make it easier for them to break it down for you. However, before they grant you access to ask them specific questions, you must first have proven that you are respectful, humble, and caring as we have talked about in the previous section.
Old people also need you around them
Look at this relationship as a win-win affair. Everyone wins. As much as you want to learn so much from older people in the years they have left, they also need you around them. Old people easily feel lonely. Some of their friends are no more, some are far away from there, and the rest are also experiencing the reality of ageing. They may have lost their spouse as well.
These make them to be in a constant search for companionship or friendship. Older people want young ones and children to be around them, just to keep them active and unisolated. Also, because they have experienced many of your current experiences, they are able to accurately predict your actions to a reasonable level. This makes them feel powerful about themselves.
Old people act irrationally to you if you stop giving them the respect they seek, or if you are not caring well enough for them. Another reason why they would act irrationally is if they have some underlying health issues. Otherwise, they always want younger people around them.
Conclusion
There are a lot of invaluable life lessons you can learn from older people. Why not avail yourself of that opportunity? Many people do not know exactly how to gain access into the inner circle of older people, but that is where you get free life lessons that would make you many times wiser than your peers.
I have given you other benefits of being close to older people. You have also seen specific ways to learn the best life lessons from older people. Older people can give their own problems too but being close to them is a blessing disguise.
