The most ironic thing about love I have ever heard is the saying that, “the people we don’t love are dying just to have us, but the ones we fall deeply in love with do not even know we exist”. Everyone can testify to this statement as we have experienced this in one way or another at some point in each and every one of our lives.
There is a consensus about who falls in love faster – guys or ladies? The argument seems to go in favour of the ladies, emphasizing that men may have been studied to express falling in love faster than ladies. This, however, does not take into account the fact that we mostly live in male-dominated societies as far as love and relationships are concerned. Only the guys have the universal freedom to approach a lady, the reverse may be much more difficult in many societies.
But aside from that, there are times when you as a guy loves a lady, probably at first sight, or even after several contacts with her and there is a possibility that she does feel the same way towards you. However, it might be more difficult for you to know for sure for the fact that a lady can conceal her feelings for long periods simply because she doesn’t want to appear to be the one initiating a relationship even though she might throw in some non-verbal cues that she likes you. As a guy, you just have to be the one to do the wooing, it’s left for her to accept you or turn you down.
To make a girl fall in love with you, you’ve got to develop some emotional strategies. Falling in love is very different from just liking someone. A girl can like you and not fall in love. Also, a girl can like you, she wants to fall in love with you but she has not yet fallen in love with you. In any of these cases, the common denominator is how to make her fall in love with you.
When she finally falls in love with you, the signs become pretty obvious to everyone that she has accepted you. It might take some time to finally win her heart over but even more than just that, there are a couple of things (I called them emotional strategies) you would need to arm yourself with so that you will be able to make your dream girl fall in love with you. Here we go…
5 Emotional strategies To Make Any Girl Fall In Love With You
I called them “emotional strategies” because they are often a reflection of how developed your emotional strength has become and they can influence the emotions of any girl you approach. If there are no physical, social, cultural or religious barriers, these strategies can help you get that girl even more easily.
1. Emotional Intelligence
Technically, emotional intelligence is the ability to perceive, control and evaluate emotions in a relationship. It is your ability to understand the emotion of someone and relate their reactions to the emotional state at that time.
Several factors affect how people respond to things around them. A girl, much like anybody else, could smile warmly at your gesture at one point but would express great disappointment and anger for that same gesture at a much later time. For simplicity of understanding, I will break down emotional intelligence into the following components;
Understanding: This entails that you are able to understand the context of the girl’s actions, why she behaved the way she did and why she does some of the things you may not like. Many times, guys are too self-centred to accept that a girl have her own life to live too, we just want her to conform to our own lifestyle but this belief will never make the girl you are interested in to fall in love with you, rather it will push her away from you.
Empathy: When a girl finds a guy that understands her and who tries to see things from her perspective, she falls hopelessly in love with him. The world is hostile enough to have someone add to your already existing problems. Girls, particularly, have realized that very few empathic people exists, people who attempt to see things the way they do and who would not judge each and every of her actions negatively without considering how she views the entire scenario. Being able to think like your woman or woman-to-be also saves you from worrying unnecessarily over her actions, or prevent you from misconstruing that she doesn’t love you when in fact, she actually does. This brings us to the next heading, emotional maturity.
2. Emotional Maturity
No doubt, girls are also attracted to physical features – a muscular physique, full beards, considerable height and good looks. Much more than these, girls look out for maturity.
Whenever the topic of maturity is being discussed, age is what pop out to the top but suffice to say that maturity is not just about age. Even more importantly, emotional maturity typically depends on how much you have developed your emotional strength following some of your past emotional experiences.
To understand the concept of emotional maturity better, I will give this illustration here: A girl you are interested in comes around you, then you try to initiate a conversation with her but instead of giving you a reply, she turns her face to the other direction acting as though you are not even there. This can be distressing and annoying, anyone can attest to that. However, one sure strategy to win your girls heart over is by being able to handle her ills and excesses without expressing much emotions – of anger, rage or disappointment.
Not only does your capacity for emotional maturity make her fall in love with you, it also signals to her that she will have a peaceful and pleasant relationship with you thereafter.
3. Social Maturity
Social maturity may refer to many different concepts already existing but in this context, social maturity refers to your ability to make a girl stay secure and confident when they are with you in the public. Many guys immediately make girls feel uncomfortable around them through certain gestures and cues.
Girls are very observant people, they study every gesture, movement, just anything, even what you may be thinking at the moment, and whenever they feel that you are losing touch with them or you are distracted from the conversation with them, they get uncomfortable.
It is important that you stay confident when interacting with them, put your mind on them and make them feel that it is just the both of you left in the entire world. Practically, sometimes you may need to fix your gaze at her while ignoring every other distractions in your immediate environment.
I mentioned that girls, or just any observant person, can perceive your thoughts to a large extent and act in a way that shows that you are too predictable. Thus, nothing intrigues a girl than a man who does not express his emotions so openly, who does not attach fixated meanings to their actions and whose thoughts and emotions does not appear to be directly influenced by events around him. This is what social maturity involves and when a girl sees such a guy, a part of her irresistibly falls in love with him.
4. Listening Skills
How else do you show that you are concerned about the needs of someone than by listening to them? Listening is an active hearing process. It is active in the sense that you are making conscious efforts to understand, interpret, retain information with the aim of being able to retrieve it at a much later period.
Listening also entails that you understand the context, the mood of the speaker and the emotional state of the speaker at that time. Listening helps you understand the totality of the girl’s speech but if you think you don’t be attentive, then it will shock you to know that girls know when you are listening and when you are not even if you try to pretend as though you were.
Just as a quick tip, effective listening can be achieved by focusing on all the elements of the speech – the sound, the words, and the meaning. For example, if you are engaging in an interaction with a girl you like and she says “Where are you going?”, anyone might have heard this question even when they were not so focused on listening. But what makes it different from effective listening?
In effective listening, you are going to subconsciously analyse the words, “Where”, “are”, “you” and “going”. Using only “where”, you can notice that “where” is a monosyllabic word that sounds like “w-yair”. If you try to pronounce this sound in your head, together with other words in the sentence, you can get a feel of the context and content of the speech. Fortunately, when you are actively listening to a girl this way, she notices it, and when you are not, it pushes her away from you.
When you are wooing a lady, you don’t expect her to fall in love with you overnight even if she already likes to have you as a partner. You have to give it some time. There is an ongoing consensus on how long you should wait before probably giving up the chase but there is really no exact time I could specify right now but in any case, you just have to be patience.
When it comes to getting a woman to fall in love with you, there are really no impossibilities. Even when you are rejected by a girl, she can still come back to fall in love with you. However, when a girl rejects you, you have to take her word for it even if she doesn’t mean it that way. If she says no to you, take her no for it but if she is unsure, man, you have your big chances.
Whether you are chasing after a single girl who likes you or one who is not so interested in you, or if she has rejected you for any reasons before, you just have to exercise patience if you are going to ever get her at all. Being impatience only makes things worse.
3 Wrong Ways To Make A Girl Fall In Love With You
How not to make a girl fall in love. Source: girl hates me, Getty Images. Modified
1. Enticing with gifts and money
Giving gifts is a sign of love and interest in someone but enticing a girl to fall in love with you because of your gifts may not absolutely be the best way. Many girls would reject your gifts if they think the gifts will bias their judgment to make them fall in love with you, others will accept your gifts but still be able to say no in the end.
If you are going to give gifts, do so because you simply want to express your love and not because you want to force her to fall in love with you because it may not go as planned. Ultimately, you would have to fall back to understanding the five emotional strategies of making her fall in love with you to get her.
2. Luring her to have sex with you
Sex creates not just a physical bond but also an emotional and, as some would say, a spiritual bond between the partners. By having sex with someone, you can get to keep them in a relationship for as long as possible. You can spark the fire of love by having sex with them. However, there are shortcomings to this.
Sex alone is not a good foundation for any relationship. What comes when there is no sex? If the relationship succeeds and it eventually leads to marriage, will you always engage in sex with your partner? Shortly, other things might come up that may require you to be matured enough to handle them. Just being able to take a woman to bed and convincing her to have sex with you will not suffice to solve those problems.
3. Lying to make a good impression
Why lie to impress a lady just because you want her to fall in love with you? Love by itself, requires that the partners understand each other, knows themselves pretty well and are willing to move on together. Secrecy and deceit will only knock down the relationship you are trying to protect.
Well, lying might make her fall in love with you but for how long? The truth have a way of coming out at its right time and trust me, she is not going to take it lightly, not at all.
It is possible to make any girl fall in love with you if you understand the five emotional strategies in this article. As a disclaimer, this guide is not intended to empower you to make multiple women fall in love with you. Of course, it may fail you if you attempt to do so. However, it is designed to help you get that girl for whom you have sleepless nights, the one you genuinely want to be with.
Also note that you should be ready to let go if you find a girl that is already committed to another. This is an aspect of maturity that every girl wants. Yes, relationship is not marriage and as long as she is not married to them, she can still be yours in the long-run. Maturity also requires that you move and let her live her independent life as much as possible.
I hope this article was insightful full and you learnt one or two things from it. Please, feel free to drop a comment below. Thank you for reading.
I am a seasoned writer, not because I am some genius but thanks to many years of trials, failure, and near successes. I curate the most content on this website; all geared towards making you a better and happier audience.