Dude, if you have been single for more than a year after your last relationship, you’d agree with me that finding a girlfriend is not so easy, and not to talk of finding a good one at that. You see girls whom you love dearly but they don’t want you. Others that are killing for you, you don’t want them.
Accidentally, you stumble across a good girl that shares some attraction for you as well. Next, she tells you she is already engaged to her boyfriend and would be getting married soon. F*ck, it’s that bad.
We all admit that finding a girlfriend is not as easy as one would imagine, but oftentimes, it is because you are either not doing something right or you are stuck in your house all day long.
Finding a good girlfriend is not also not as difficult as it can get, particularly if you know the right steps to take. Here, you will see 10 powerful steps on how to win yourself a lover, friend, and everything sweet all in one girl.
Why you need a girlfriend
There are several reasons why you might think you need a girlfriend.
1. To satisfy your emotion about loving and being loved
Come on, let’s not deny it. It feels good to be in love, to have someone you can call your own and with who you share some close intimacy. This could be your own reason why you want to have a girlfriend.
2. For companionship
Life can get lonely, and I believe one of the principal reasons for marriage and relationships is companionship. You want to find someone that can pat your back or rub your shoulders when you feel broken down. don’t you?
3. To feel among
The official age for beer consumption in most countries is 18 years. The legally acceptable age for dating for most countries is 16 years even though there are no strict restrictions below that age with the condition that it is between peers.
The drive for relationship and love are natural drives but asides from that it can also be a form of peer influence where you simply want to feel belonged to the group of those who have relationship partners.
4. To get some help
Some relationships can be very helpful indeed. You might want to enter a relationship because you need some help developing yourself and/or your career.
Flashback to high school, the girls just want to be with the nerd because he will help them with their homework. Deep down, a need for some physical, or moral assistance might be your reason for wanting a girlfriend.
5. Committed sexual partner
While there are no legal restrictions on the number of people you can sleep with, the risk for sexually transmitted infections increases with the number of partners you have sex with. In the ABC algorithm for prevention of sexually transmitted infections, if you cannot “abstain” – A, then “be faithful” – B.
6. Courtship and marriage
The ultimate aim of most romantic relationships is marriage, and by this, you want to find someone who also wants to commit to a long-lasting union with you.
For whatsoever reason(s), finding a girlfriend follows the same basic principles that you will see shortly. The task might look daunting but I will simplify it as much as possible for you in this post.
10 Steps on Finding a (Good) Girlfriend
1. Discover your specific reason why you need a girlfriend
In finding a girlfriend, the first thing you need to do is to resolve your specific reasons for desiring to have a girlfriend. Then judge your reason(s) based on your own personal standards. Sometimes, you may discover that your reasons do not carry enough weight. Either way, understanding your specific reasons will help you as you search for your girlfriend-to-be.
2. Discover what you truly want in a girl
Many times, you see women with different shades of beauty and you admire them all. In searching for a girlfriend, however, you need to define the specific criteria to look out for in a woman, both physical, moral, and otherwise. Only try not to be too strict and unrealistic in your conditions. For example, know the attributes you absolutely want in your girl, and those you can be flexible about.
3. Get a career or something doing
You are more likely to get a girlfriend who is committed to you if you have something to do. This is the time to begin to look into yourself to discover your peculiar passions and abilities that can earn you money. Go search for your dream job, or just about anything that can make you independent, because girls always love it when you are independent.
Some guys chase after women with all their energy without chasing what is even more pressing. If you get it right, you will have more options for girlfriends than if you are some liability that over 50% of girls would naturally turn down already.
4. Build your confidence
In your search for a girlfriend, you need to be confident if you are not already so. There are a great many guys who approach women on a daily basis. What sets you apart from the crowd is the confidence you exude that most other guys might not possess.
Confidence also means that you need to build yourself to act, speak and behave convinced when you are wooing or asking her out for a date. Dressed nicely when you are likely to be around where you can find a girlfriend. Be composed in your speech and general outlook and try to make it real and genuine.
5. Go out more often
No one gets a girlfriend by staying indoors all the time. But yet, very many of us are guilty of this, for different reasons. Maybe you always have a busy schedule at a job that does not allow you regular contact with women, or you are just too lazy to leave the house. You will need to work something out so you can go out more often.
Even if you are Micheal Jackson, your girlfriend won’t just fly into your life without you making some efforts to go out and get her.
Attend more social gatherings – church, parties, coffee shops, cultural events, etc.
6. Be more observant
You cannot find a girlfriend by keeping your eyes closed. Observe a girl you admire closely, examine her both physically and otherwise. Is she available for a relationship, is she ready, does it look like she already has a boyfriend, or do you really like her?
It’s possible to feel pressured into settling with just about anyone through desperation, but being carefully observant is important for finding a good girlfriend that will make you feel happy and satisfied.
6. Learn to flirt with women
Flirting is an act of playing with a girl in a sexually suggestive or romantic way. Girls generally love flirting and would find the presence of someone who makes her feel romantic more pleasant. To attract girls into your relationship radar, you need to display your ability to flirt
Flirting does not necessarily have to begin after you have found your girlfriend. Flirt with random girls and along the way, you might find your girlfriend. If you still do not know much about flirting, you can learn some things about it here.
8. Be kindhearted
Kindness to other people gives the impression to girls who are interested in you from a distance that you are a kindhearted person. This will make them want to be with you if given the opportunity. That means, even before you have the chance to ask her out, she already has a soft spot for you.
Kindness should not be taken as stupidity or foolishness. If you are too nice, sometimes, some ladies interpret it as weakness and inability for you to protect their interests when they accept you into their life. To prevent this, you need to know your boundaries and set your priorities when you are being nice.
Lastly, kind-heartedness is the quality of being kind to everyone irrespective of what you gain or what you don’t.
9. Heal fully from past relationship breakups
It is practically impossible to find love when you are still wallowing in your experiences from your former relationship. If you recently left a broken relationship, you should make efforts to move on from the experiences, in such a way that they do not negatively affect your behaviors in your upcoming relationship.
It will be very difficult to decide to be with anyone if you are too careful to reject any sign that may resemble your old relationship. If you have not fully healed from the pain of the previous relationship, you may transfer that hurt into your new relationship. Once you have fully healed (which should be deliberately done), you begin to be open again and treat your new partner as a different person from your past.
10. Use dating apps or social media
Sometimes, your schedule at work makes it very difficult to go out as often as you should. Thankfully, several dating apps have been built to help people find a partner. Today, many blossoming relationships and marriages have started over the internet, either through dating sites or social media. Dating sites examples include eHarmony, Zoosk, Higher Bond, Christian Mingle, Jdate, Elite Singles, Catholic Match, etc.
The only precaution you should take is not allowing yourself to fall deeply in love with someone you have only seen on social media or dating apps but have never seen in person.
How To Make Your New Girlfriend Fall in Love With You
We have already established that it is not easy to find a girl or to make her your girlfriend. After meeting your dream girl, the journey has only just begun.
Making your girlfriend fall deeply in love with you while you also fall deeply in love with her is the secret to the most romantic experience you could ever experience in your relationship. While falling in love might come naturally and easily to some people, others would require some time to experience it.
Here, I will tip you on a few strategies to make your girlfriend fall in love with you after finding her.
- Be persistent: A girl’s attraction for you does not automatically translate to love. She has a lot of things to consider before allowing herself to make the decision to fall in love with you. To prove your sincerity, you need to be persistent through the period when she is considering all these factors.
- Don’t overdo it: Persistency sometimes means you have to be a fool just because you need to win her heart, but you also need to set some limits to it. For example, taking a day or two off from texting or calling her will not make her lose interest in you but it will make you appear more disciplined and responsible.
- Know when to quit: Being persistent definitely pays off but not in the way that you might expect it. When you persistently pursue the girl of your dream, two things can happen. You can truly get her as your girlfriend or you don’t. If she makes it obvious to you that nothing is possible between you both, know that it is time to cut the chase.
Some FAQs Relating to Finding A Girlfriend
Can I find a girlfriend if I have no friends?
For you to be able to find a girl and then get her as your girlfriend, you need to go out more often. This increases your chances of meeting someone you will be attracted to and who also would be interested in you as well. Remember, to get a girlfriend, oftentimes you need to leave your comfort zone.
When is the right time to get a girlfriend?
There is, in fact, no exact right time to get a girlfriend in regards to age. As long as you have had a clear plan for your life, and you think you have what it takes to handle a relationship, that is the right time.
Sometimes, people go into relationships very early. Even though most of those feelings are only childish, these relationships also serve their purposes too. On the question of when the right time to get a girlfriend is, it depends on the individual and what his reasons for getting a girlfriend are.
Can I get a girlfriend if I am shy?
Of course, yes. Not everybody is as bold as King Kong when it comes to finding a partner. When you find a woman who complements you well enough, your little efforts will get her for you. However, it is still necessary to work on your self-confidence.
Can I get a girlfriend online?
Yes, you can get a girlfriend online. Gone are the days when finding love was strictly initiated physically. Today, it is possible to get your dream girl to be your forever partner on social platforms. Dating websites and social media are examples of those social platforms that can get you a girlfriend.
Can I get a girlfriend at 13?
Final words
Getting a girlfriend after long periods of being single is not always a straightforward task but with these steps, you will be able to find yourself a good girl and then easily make her your girlfriend. A major part of the game depends on your readiness to settle down and your ability to handle a serious relationship with your girl. Wish you the best
